We Will Always Have Paris

The family of Paris Hilton has hired PR attack dog Michael Sitrick to repair the released jailbird's reputation. According to Gawker.com, a New York-based website that focuses on media news and gossip, Sitrick is "a PR pit bull ... a master of spin ... someone who will stop at nothing to turn public opinion in his clients' favor." His other clients have included billionaire businessman Ron Burkle, fired Wal-Mart marketer Julie Roehm, the Archdiocese of Los Angeles during its pedophile priest scandal, Halle Berry when she faced hit-and-run charges, and Rush Limbaugh during his prescription pill addiction scandal. How does Sitrick perfume the reputations of these human stink bombs? "His methods are aggressive and strategic," writes Gawker. "He uses what he calls 'truth squads' to monitor the media (including blogs) to ferret out inaccuracies about his clients and 'wheel-of-pain' tactics against his client's foes — a campaign of negative publicity intended to spur a quick settlement."